Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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