Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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