Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Randomize
