He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Randomize