so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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