I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
