pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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