Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
