By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
