There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
