But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
dude. I can hear the air.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
