also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
