oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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