Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
