Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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