i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
