I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
