just come out here and I will go home with you...
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
