You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
