I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
