sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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