K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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