is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
