I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
