Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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