Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
