is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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