She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
