Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
