my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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