if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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