if you like me you must not know who I am
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
