Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
