big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Randomize
