Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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