Nicole vs. Life
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
