Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
