I need help removing her.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
