wanna go halves on a baby?
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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