so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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