i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
