Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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