Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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