i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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