I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
