Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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