dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
