If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
