Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
