I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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